So it has been 3 weeks since my little fighters have been born...cannot believe it...they have been through so much in their 3 weeks of life.
Yesterday both Brayden and Aiden had to have blood transfusions bc their hematocrit levels were really low. It was Aiden's first and Brayden has already had a couple.
Brayden is still trying to fight off his infection...his white cell count did go up testers after it has been going down but the nurses say it's probably bc of the low blood volume so hopefully it starts to go down again.
On the upside, their weights are up...Brayden is 1oz away from his birth weight...he's at 1lbs 13oz now...Aiden is at 2lbs 8oz now...he is 5oz away from his birth weight...I know their weights will go up and down but cannot wait until they are above their birth weight.
Lately I have been thinking a lot about their development and what it will be like as they grow older. I try not to think too far in the future but it's hard for me not to...it's just how I am...it has been very stressful and tiring...just not sure how much more I can handle...but I know I need to for the boys including my cutie Caleb. I think what would help is finding others who are in a similar situation to talk to...even though I have a great support system I think it would really help me if I could meet with others who knows what I am going through and can give me some good news...
What has been helping me through the days is seeing my cutie Caleb's adorable face every day! He does make my days brighter by all the things he is learning. He is learning new words every day like good, uh oh, saying bye bye and hi and waving, car, balloon, bottle and others which surprise me every day...all the things he understands which surprises me every day as well and the things we do together that he is picking up like putting puzzle pieces in the right place, doodling and wanting to read with me. He is our rainbow baby so my husband and I are trying to spend as much time as possible with him before Brayden and Aiden come home...
In a way having had them come early has been a blessing so I don't have to be on bedrest the whole time before the twins come home so that I can spend time with Caleb and do all kinds of things with him. For instance we got to go to the zoo, and to state fair...and looking forward to doing a lot more things with him!
Guess that's it for now...
Hang in there hon. Take it one day at a time. Email Laurie from our class, maybe even call Children's Hospital, i'm sure they have a support group for this, even though i don't think your kids are there.. maybe even look into transfering them... When i heard what happened i did a lot of research.. and some of it is good nad some not so good... But what happens to one kid doesn't happen to another so keep that in mind. All you can do is be there and pray, what will come, will come... your doing really well. Take time out yourself to.. What your and your family are going thru is a lot... but remember take care of yourself. We are all here for you.
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